My thoughts

I have to write three reports in less than 1 month..... The first is a literature review on my new project topic (I have no idea what I want to research on) The second is an academic conference article which is due at the end of November (this conference is in France!!! I've always wanted to go to France what good way to travel for free only thing needed is an article for the conference) And the third is a correction of a journal paper I already wrote (some nosy Prof didn't understand what I wanted to convey to the general public). I am beginning to see this is the typical life of a graduate student. It seems I was getting the easy life during my masters but now with PhD the training wheels are gone. I must say it sucks big time I hate studying or writing any academic work and the question I keep asking myself what am I doing here? Then I get an answer that puts me back on track all the time " this is what makes you happy, researching, coming up with the most absurd thin...

My sister came to visit a few weeks ago from Nigeria. It was a blast (some pictures on the side). I realised how much I missed home and never have time for a holiday. With all the fun I forgot to do my usually financial planning and that came back to bite me. Enough about the money, why make money when you wont spend it huh? I do ask myself that some times never really get a good answer. After my sister left it dawned on me that I never take out time to just relax, there is always a deadline to meet or some studying to do. And if I spend time just relaxing or having fun I feel guilty. So I have decided that from next year I will start what I call 'day saving' account. It wont be in the bank but I will set out some days every month just to have fun, relax and not feel guilty. After all laughter is good medicine for the soul.

I've wanted to crush, harm and kill my supervisor at every stage of my masters degree studies. But I didn't. I even thought of getting a hit man But I didn't. Things got better, we started communicating, I made inputs which he thought could pass for average intelligence. Things were not honeymoony but they were ok. I could live with that. We even started talking about my PhD topics, what would be fun to do, how long it would take and all those boring stuff. The peaceful relationship continued until last Friday. What happened last Friday? What didn't happen!!!!!! He shattered a fragile 'friendship'. All he had to do was tell me I was an Idiot in private not when I am taking my oral examination to graduate. There is no way I am blaming this on his lack of the right English words to say. Would it kill that man to give out just a little compliment? Anywhere I know I am venting but if I don't do it here where would I? Definitely not in front o...

Perugia is a small city in the heart of Italy with love for jazz and chocolate. It is a very quiet town with a magnificent view that you can not get in any metropolitan cities. You may ask why I am going on and on about a small city, well the answer is obvious; I went there. My first trip to Europe landed me in Perugia. Everything that could go wrong went wrong,. The food on the plane was horrible . I almost had food poisoning. I almost missed my flight because the wrong gate was printed on my boarding pass. So there I am a black woman running like a headless chicken in Frankfurt International Airport. I missed my train. I had not eaten for one full day and not eating properly makes me cranky to say the least. I arrived at Perugia and had a good time. Although it was an academic conference I made sure I enjoyed all the sunshine I could get because I was returning back to cold cold winter.

If I have to chose a favorite season, Autumn would be my best season. The leaves falling, the weather sunny but not too hot, the calm and serene environment reminds me so much of home. Pity Autumn is the shortest weather over here. So I will enjoy it as much as I can.

As a child I did not have to worry about what to eat, wear or do. All those things were planned out for me. There was a timetable for everything. I miss those days. Those were my thoughts as I rush out of my room this morning, I slept late again!!! I've been telling myself I'll wake up early for the past two weeks but something always happens its like mother nature or earth or the weather or something does not want me out of my bed before 9am. I do not mind sleeping in on any normal day. The joy of working with only men is they never ask you why you are late so they do not hear what will spoil their day. The last two months have not been any normal day for me. There are deadlines to meet and proposals to write. Deciding on what to eat or wear has become a very very great task for me. Now I understand why celebrates need dressers, it is not easy. Now I am here at 2:30pm still thinking of what to have for breakfast, something filling but not too heavy or unhealthy or fattening. S...

I am a comfort shopper. That is my reason for shopping so much and I am sticking to it. When I am happy, sad, angry, or just tired I shop. I have realized my problem and I want to quite. I tried to follow the 5 or 7 steps routines alcoholics do but its not worked out at all. March was the most trying period of my rehabilitation. It all went well for a while until the deadlines started streaming in. Of course I tried to meet all th deadlines both the self imposed and official ones, but things just kept piling up. The last straw was last Wednesday, when I handed in one of my articles just to have my supervisor reject the whole thing and tell me to start from scratch. Did I mention I had spent two nights without sleep to research, pro gramme and finally write up the research article? Did my supervisor know I had spent so long trying to hand in my work on time? Yes he did. So why would he reject my work? The only way to obtain the answer to that question would be through torture. This mea...

Crazy 8 is a game of cards, very popular among the blacks in Southern Africa. There are rules and penalties in the game but the most interesting part of the game is the speed in which it is played. I feel my life is like that game the only difference is that there are 7 days in a week not 8. When i wake up on Sunday morning, there are so many things to do before I step out to church, after church I find my self heading towards the University campus. Then there is the moody Monday, for some reason I do not like Mondays. First there is the boring meeting that I cant escape then there are the emails that must be answered, and of course people popping in and requesting for things like I'm some sort of storage room. Tuesdays sometimes are fun but other times like today are horrible. I am having a writer's block. Why it is called that I have no Idea, all I want to do is head back home and have the longest power nap ever recorded in history, 10hours. Wednesdays are when the panic sets...

I have not written for a long time. My excuse is that I have been busy. The truth is, I do not know what to write. Several things have happened in the past months I have not written. I went home i.e. Nigeria and came back, I have finished my programming and hoping to complete my thesis soon, and I have also made new friends. I must say I have a better rapport with my supervisor now. I do not know if he is glad I am finally leaving or if he is really making an effort to have a better understanding of me. I stand out in my study group because I have refused to let what I study define what wear or eat or say. I have refused to look like all those women engineers that put on only a pair of jeans and a t-shirt with boots. I wear heels, use make up, wear skirts and I even let my hair down sometimes. The picture is how I look today. I felt gorgeous and I thought to myself, why don't I look it? I promise I am back to writing about MY THOUGHTS